vain

does death

always have to come

with vain

 

if the proper steps aren’t taken,

if you decide

to sit with it for a while,

question

why the loss of something,

someone,

can’t just stand still, be what it is,

a truth that lays down

beneath the dirt besides its owner,

doesn’t trickle into the water

asking you to take a drink,

to take it as your own.

 

it’s hard work, making sense of it;

but maybe we are responsible, in part.

 

maybe we can choose, if we are willing,

if we are able, to hold onto the love

that you have lost and rekindle it,

make it something valuable, something important–

something that, in it’s own way,

allows us to say,

“At least he didn’t die in vain.”

 

July 30, 2017

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Trees

My back

is strong

like a piece of bark

it has its edges

but it is stable,

it stands tall–

it is stillness

and silence

and me.

 

These elements

of control

have never been

my friend.

 

Illusive fears

of loosing

a self

that I had forged

by lack of force

the word loss–

I could write odes

to loss

and sonnets

to loss

and haikus

to loss

and I would still

remained

lost

in the same sentiment

 

Who am I?

 

Where do these attachments

leave me?

Where did I acquire them?

 

Did death bring up something

deep inside of me

that always needed healing?

 

An unknowingness of stability,

the entrance of doubt?

 

I am here, writing,

wondering,

thinking back to trees with hearts

written in their sides.

 

October 8, 2016

Be Still

It’s been a while

since the clock struck twelve

and all the world

was quiet–

all the past forgiven,

no sirens a-screamin,

just belief

in the silence,

in the tears.

 

The sky has cried

and so have I

to release

all this strange human guilt,

for puddles aside,

we can read all the lies:

the treasure is at the end

of the death row:

 

Death of The Other,

Death of The End,

Death of It’ll Never Happen Again,

a feeling of peace,

a meaning in light,

where all can let go

and be still.

 

October 19, 2015

Once You’re Gone

for someone I love

 

Life is a wonderful

trap you fail to acknowledge

until you break it off.

 

Never again will you see

such troubled waves,

days haunted by midnight’s

killer stare.

 

You will not dare to question

why the world extends

its wings, like a naive eagle

circling America

while the universe laughs,

chokes, laughs again.

 

Imagine the painstaking,

worth-its-while peace

that would shoot up,

out of the sky

if we simply loved–

if you just kept on walking.

March 17, 2014