If you read my words,

do not simply hold them in your mouth;

taste them, see if they are to your liking,

and spill them out into our silly little world.


February 20, 2016


why I’m still into monogamy

Like a sunflower at dawn

the light circles the window,

slowly, from pane to pane:

white fabric fading along

the edges, the slight smudge

of gray near the nightstand,

a black and white journal

shedding its ink. The carpet

is still blue, like an autumn sky

with a few scattered clouds,

makeup stains sprawling.

The dresser is dark wood and tall

like a castle, the mirror elegantly

gazing at the front wall, a pair

of slippers hiding underneath.  I

open two drawers and find them

empty; the other four, stacked full:

old T-shirt memories, championships

and golf tournaments, razorbacks

and soft wool sweaters mixed together.

The bed seems bigger now, a new down

cover reminding me of a new castle,

a different prince– one I could never get

to know in one lifetime, let alone one day.

But I can still sit here, quietly, observing

the nooks and crannies, allowing time to

haunt its human victim into realizing that

we can never fully know a thing, a person,

a place– so I might as well spend my life

with one man, one window, one room,

learning to love all the fuzzy details I am

lucky enough to capture.


happy love day!  I’ve been wanting to write a poem like this for a while, now…I’m sure I will be returning to it in the future, to tweak it here and there; but the underlying message will most likely stay the same.  I’m super open to all types of relationships that people explore and feel drawn to, and this is what feels right to me.  xo

February 13, 2016

The Story

It’s what we write every day and, whether we are fully aware of it or not, it’s the grandest story of all:

The Story of My Life.

From the news and social media, to conversations at work and on the street, stories make up the “stuff” of our lives.  I truly believe that we are more than all of this “stuff.”  When you take it all away, there is only the simplicity of life churning away through our veins and souls, connecting us all to the universe.

And yet we still live here, on Earth.  We are always in the midst of other people and countless narratives.  We can’t just run from them.   The world will keep turning.  Even if we close off all our senses, the stories that make up society aren’t going to go away.  Yes, we can shape our personal narrative by stating: “My life is more important than my life story.” And you’d be right!  I am solidly in that camp.  But we are still responsible for our stories.

What do you tell yourself, about yourself, every day?  How do you view your relationship with others, with yourself?  Where does your self confidence fall based on these guidelines?

If I have a problem, I like to think about it in broad terms, considering the evidence of one truth versus another.  By doing so, however, I put a lot of pressure on myself (and my brain) to get it right.  As if I have all the answers!  It’s insane, and yet this pressure follows me day to day, allowing myself to identity with both intelligence and inability.  So when I ask myself the question, “Am I capable of changing how I tell my life story?” I doubt myself.

Do you have any doubts about yourself, about your abilities– about your story?

A wise friend of mine told me today that fresh starts are precious: not everyone can have them, and you can do whatever you want with them.

They symbolize ultimate freedom.

Today, as I find myself in the beginnings of another “fresh start,” I’m taking a stand.  I want to claim responsibility for telling my life story–  to the world, to others, and (most importantly) to myself.

In more ways than not, I am whatever I want to be.  I am whatever I believe myself to be.  There’s no pressure to know everything or for everything to be perfect.   But I’m the main character in this play, as well as the audience.  All I can do is balance the tragedy with the comedy and know that, in the end, my “life” under my “life situation,” my “life story,” will always be there.


So, hey you!  You’re a person with a story.  Go out there and write a good one.

I Like…

I like people

who are full-time open books,

they don’t pick and choose

what pages to fill

I like forgiveness,

for even a friend will have a flaw

I like my freedom,

for it is never too little too late

I like late nights,

but only when they lead

to fulfilled mornings


I wear my patience thin,

it seems,

chasing improvement and growth

more than truly liking the “now”


I like when “now” has a feeling:


I like rolling-over-laughing-fits

that tickle the sides of the throat;

I like birthday parties,

singing to a girl who has not yet

handed over her naivety to society;

I like knowing where I’m at,

but not what stop I’ll be taking

in the future;

I like butterflies and fairy dust–

as long as they’re meant

to provide a long-lost “answer”

to life’s riddles, its rhymes,

its warn-out-masterpieces


I like when I look at boys

I like and they look at me back

and like it


I like being updated

on the trails of those important to me,

I like being heard

and not ignored

I like knowing that I’ll wake up in the morning

and put on a yellow jacket,

see skin color not as a target

but as a human,


armed with a pencil, a pen,

to take me back again,

to a place where time was slow,

“now” stayed “now,”

and we all strived to make a difference

in the lives of others.


May 8, 2015


A summary of “likes” in a City Year life … check out more about the fantastic organization I have served with now for 9 months @ http://www.cityyear.org/ ….   HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY