To my beautiful baby brother:
you have to grow up in an age of social media
and all of its toxins
and it is not your fault.
You have no control over it,
nor do I.
All I want do to is live it for you—
the mass shooting threats,
every day life in boring ass high school —
keep it boring!
School was meant to be that way,
safe enough to be boring.
Not even the white people are safe,
not even the rich people.
My beautiful Puerto Rican brother:
do you fit in? do you like it? do you not?
Tell me more than “ugh.”
I know your innocent face,
your soul-searching eyes
I have seen your heart
and its pure essence
a thousand times.
I just hope I told you enough stories…
about how much you are loved,
and how smart and kind and handsome
you are, my brother — you can do it,
because it cannot last for much longer.
I will take every bullet of some child
calling out for help;
I will relive 9th, 10th — fuck, every grade
if that is what it takes to protect you,
to take up that space of wondering.
The world has changed
in just 10 short years between me and you.
Look at what Facebook has done,
kids sending Snaps 1,000 times a day.
My brother I do not know shit about “SnapChat”
but I know you are more than it,
I promise you.
Everyone is wandering,
looking for more than a screen—
and yet video games have saved you.
Play SmashBros all freaking day
if that is what it takes to save you, my boy,
from giving a damn what people think.
How do I protect you from this world…
this pit of society
that is eating minds and bodies alive?
How do I get you to talk truth?
Who cares “how.”
Know that it is enough to try,
enough to be with yourself,
Whenever your body yells,
Cradle every part
and say, “I am here for you, always.”
your sister is here for you.
March 29, 2019